“To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow - this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.” 
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage

All of the love that we need is here now. The search is over. You have arrived. You are the source of all of the love you will ever receive. It is your mission in life to tap into the love within yourself and to learn who you are fully, and then to let all of your shadows fall away. As humans, we build up images of ourselves through the people we encounter, but as humans we also have control of the image we want to create for ourselves. 

If you want to be a 'runner' start running. If you want to be a 'singer' start singing. If you want to be an artist, sculptor, cross fit master, etc... just start. Simple. When what you are doing aligns with your love for doing it, the truth will carry over and you will become whatever it is you wish you become. The physical body is wonderfully capable of working within its means to be whatever it is you wish it to be. The actions we put into the world are an important piece of the self-confidence aspect of ourselves. Whatever we commit time to, fully and with an open heart, we assimilate into ourselves. 

With love, the answer is simple. Love yourself first, and then you can love others. "Love your neighbor as thyself." Love yourself the way you would want to love your neighbor. This means that is an awareness of who you are and why you came to be this way and then an unconditional acceptance of the past with support and belief in the future. It is often easier to love other people on their journey to their best selves than to love ourselves into our best selves. Sometimes, most of the time, it takes another person to wake us up. Elizabeth Gilbert puts it best with an idea of soul mates:

“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. 

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. 

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master...” 
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

I'm coming down off a soul-mate encounter right now. It is arguably one of the most painful and embarrassing situations I have had with myself. It is easy to sit down with someone else and assure them that they are okay, that they didn't know better, that they were trying the best they could. It is almost nauseating to sit down and say the same things to yourself. Or then, to know where and when you could have done better, and to accept that you didn't and to move on. 

It also is nearly impossible not to want to run back to the soulmate. There is a feeling of vulnerability, of being seen, fully, that draws you back to the person who shook you up. It is almost a plea, "That is my worst. There is only good from here." and a knowing that if they chose to love you, then that love would be unconditional. But this is not how it works. The soulmate shakes you up because they cannot love these pieces of you. They have only ever been a mirror. Sometimes it takes many mirrors before you can actually see the reflection looking back at you. 

I finally see my reflection. It is clear and beautiful. It is imperfect and raw. It is calm now, knowing the work that needs to be done. That I am on my path, and that my cycle is broken. It takes courage to look at our perceived goodness and darkness and how we put them into the world. And then to ask the universe why it has given us what it has given us and how we can learn. But I'm learning, and you are learning, and we are all learning.

The thing is that all the love we need is inside of us. And that when we tap into that love, it flows out into every other aspect of our lives. That true love is moving in harmony with the world around us, and to let each person experience themselves on their journey without judgement or trying to change them. When we love how we want to be loved, we are loved.